Organised Fun

Episode 30 - Alien Vs Predator: The Hunt Begins

It's just another routine day aboard the USCSS Theseus. Oh wait, nope - it's been infested with aliens! Can a squad of brave Colonial Marines clear out the nest and save the day? Highlights include:
- 25% Shed Babies
- Alien tails give me no end of stress
- Mark hasn't ever seen Predator... because it's invisible
- My entire Marine squad = one Alien Queen
- There could be scope for utter bastardry
- I am king of the gun jam
- When you attack a load of aliens and realise you only have a combat knife
- It has lots in common with games we've played before... like... dice 
- I think you'll find Ripley does make some tight turns in the APC actually

Minisode 6 - Create Your Own

In this week's minisode, we discuss the merits of making your own board games (in a lovable, childlike way, not a moneygrabbing Kickstarter bastard way). Highlights include:
- Gary Potter is a chavvy Slytherin
- Mark was brought up in a cellar
- You can just put your own face on stuff
- Look out for 'Trains and Potholes' in a game shop near you!
- Made your own game? Want Mark to slag it off? Get in touch!
- Mark is suddenly a Guantanamo Bay expert...
 

Episode 29 - Xenoshyft

We've signed up with NorTec, and our base is under attack! Can we keep the HQ intact through the waves of alien monstrosities? Highlights include:
- I experience major diagram woes
- We get Patrick on the phone
- We pitch Game Chooser App Mega
- Mark does his best Holographic Museum Woman voice
- Stock up on fodder
- We experience a confluence of effluence
- Gary Potter??

Episode 28 - Xcom

Aliens are dropping out of orbit all over the shop, and Earth's last hope is... us. Basically, kiss the planet goodbye! Highlights include:
- Bunty gets fan mail
- Watch out for Floaters
- Mark ruins the order of things
- I forgot the atmospheric music
- Mark can't tell the difference between figures and tokens
- Our budgeting is a total mess
- We basically lost because of Asia

Episode 27 - Time Stories

We join The Consortium and blast back in time to the roaring twenties... Can we stop a temporal fault being created in a French mental asylum? Highlights include:
- Imagine Source Code and Quantum Leap had a baby...
- Also imagine Exit and House Of Danger had a baby...
- Never investigate suspicious grunting
- Watch out for manticores
- Where's the croquet?
- I forgot my cocaine addiction

Episode 26 - Star Wars Destiny

Grab your lightsabers, charge up your blasters, and watch out for Bantha poodoo as we play Star Wars Destiny! Who will win in a classic battle of Dark against Light? Highlights include:
- Board games can be used for evil
- Not Jar Jar Binks!!!
- It's all about the guns
- How do they work out age recommendations?
- Mark still can't remember the motto
- Siri gets involved

Episode 25 - NSFW Monopoly

It began with a Christmas gift full of good intentions... Bunty joins us as we plumb the depths of the gay sex trade. Just how rude can we make a game of Monopoly? Highlights include:
- This is a different level of swearing
- We get schooled on Sandy Petersen
- 10 out of 10 for 'rude'
- An orgy is better than a threesome - everyone knows that
- I fell into a porn void
- Jail is quite sexy
- Polite company? That's not where we are...
- You could do a lot of damage at an orgy, medically speaking
- Would you rather be spanked by a toff, or would you rather spank a toff?
- We get an insight into how I behave at work
- Nipple Play is a great little earner
- This game is a gift for straight ladies
- If a straight man is into spanking a posh toff, are they still a straight man?
- Warning to future visitors, this one is going on the spreadsheet!

Episode 24 - Cthulhu Wars

The world as we know it has ended, humanity is done for, and ancient evils walk the earth, vying for supremacy. Who will win the Cthulhu Wars? Highlights include:
- Fuck the environment and fuck homeless people!
- If Sandy Petersen is such a great game designer, why does he need Kickstarter?
- What is Sandy short for?
- We work ourselves into a dead end with an epic strategy fail
- Mark kills everything
- How could I not have sucked?

Episode 23 - The Game Of Life

Be a winner at The Game Of Life, find a job and money maybe, get married, have a baby, take a chance, find romance, all your dreams may come true! Highlights include:
- You get a boner from egg and cress sandwiches
- Mark really can't say the motto
- Marriage is compulsory
- Mark is a humourless wretch
- I'm not sold on the spinner
- We fail at maths
- We had pretty good lives, but never actually owned a house
- Why would you wear sunglasses if you don't have any eyes?

Episode 22 - Coma Ward

We've woken up in an abandoned hospital with no recollection of how we got there, or what's going on. All we've got to go on is this podcast episode! Will we solve the mysteries of the Coma Ward? Highlights include:
- I get my words wrong
- Mark destroys Meriel's game categories
- Hooray! Zack and Albert both survive!
- The last thing you want is to flash your junk whilst running through the hospital...
- Hospital people might need to help us out a bit
- I get condescending as fuck
- It's not shit, it just needs work

Episode 21 - Mage Wars

We enrol in the Grand Academy of Magic so we can train as kick ass Battle Mages! We've chosen our best spells, but who will win? Highlights include:
- Mark's wizard sounds like an STD
- 69% of people can't be trusted
- I've been practicing my letters
- Mark blames his poor spell choices on me
- It's Epic PvP, but done well

Episode 20 - Arkham Horror First Edition

We assemble a team of brave investigators to once more try and rescue the town of Arkham from unspeakable horror, in the original 1987 release! Highlights include:
- We get a second Hater!
- Every Monopoly cloud has a Game of Life silver lining
- We lamely attempt to pass the Bechdel test
- Dilettante? Debutante? Whatever!
- It's all a bit brisk
- It's not a maths podcast
- Finally, someone says the motto with me!

Minisode 5 - Game Types

In this Minisode, we discuss game genres and classifications! How do you know what you're getting, and how do you choose? Highlights include:
- I finally won something on Arkham Horror The Card Game
- Mark confuses Guatemala with Guantanamo Bay
- Board Games? Crystal Maze? Same thing innit
- Knowing things is a skill
- Coming soon to a games shop near you - Horror of the Whatevers
- I use a horrendous baby metaphor
- I almost forget to say the motto

Episode 19 - Star Trek Fluxx

Prepare the away team and get your red shirts on as we play Star Trek Fluxx! Highlights include:
- We get a new pet hate...
- I get shitty with Hasbro
- You're in for some quality sound effects...
- Who is Christine Chapel??
- Mark makes some controversial ranking choices...

Episode 18 - Exit

We're on a train speeding across Europe and there's been a murder! The detective solving the case has gone missing and now it's down to us to solve the crime and escape. Oh, and we're locked in, obviously. We need an exit, pronto! Highlights include:
- I have to say hello to everybody
- I do a half arsed job at box reading
- #exitstrategies
- Mark doesn't know the difference between Spades and Clubs
- We can't do logic
- If you don't spot it, you don't notice it...
- Finally Screenspiel has a new episode!
- I explain how the spreadsheet actually works
- Go to Escape Rooms Cardiff!

Episode 17 - Monopoly Gamer

Eat some mushrooms and force yourself down a pipe to collect shiny coins - sounds like a typical day on a council estate, but it's not, it's Monopoly Gamer! Highlights include:
- It's bad news for Derek Ring
- Old people can design games too
- I lose the ability to speak coherently, and I wasn't even drinking this week!
- Mark is a coin grabbing bastard
- Luigi is the shit brother
- You get to hear some stunning impressions of Wario, Peach and Boo - strap in!
- Just how big is Rosalina?

Episode 16 - Forbidden Sky

We take to the clouds, harnessing the lightning in an attempt to wire up a rocket launch pad... as you do! Join us as we play Forbidden Sky! Try not to get blown off... Highlights include:
- Apologies to Ryan Miller - your name is common
- Luke Peterschmidt is more popular than Derek Ring
- We get interrupted by a random rocket launch
- According to Mark, America owns the internet
- Cassie admits defeat
- Where's Tunisia?
- We fail to understand basic electricity
- Tactfully? Tactically? Whatever...
- What does the motto mean again?
- If in doubt, add a rocket

Episode 15 - Epic PvP Fantasy

Join us for a shufflebuilding battle of epic proportions. It's the Halfling Rogues versus the Orc Barbarians, but in the end, does it really matter? Highlights include:
- I get multilingual
- Listener Cassie has been on the blower again
- Mark refuses to drink Brandy Milk Punch
- We fail the Bechdel test
- There's some box inconsistency
- I sound like a Hater
- Mark declares this is the worst one we've played so far
- The cat is very pissed off this week

Expansion 1 - Bears Vs Babies NSFW

Join us for our first Expansion - We'll be seeing if adding a load of cocks makes a difference to Bears Vs Babies! Highlights include:
- Cassie gets a challenge
- God bless the Christians
- I retract a flashback
- Saying NSFW repeatedly is really difficult
- Some of the bears now have tits

Minisode 4 - Epic Drinking Fluxx

So we finally did it! Joined by special guests Patrick, Glen and Lee, we play Epic Drinking Fluxx with all the corresponding drinks and snacks.... did we survive the horror? High(low)lights include:
- Mark gets listener criticism
- Nobody wants to argue over a wheelbarrow or a twatty cannon
- Mark persistently forgets how to play, and acts incredulous about literally everything
- The Shiraz has not been aired
- Patrick and Lee have a background Science-off
- What is an honest amount of nuts?
- Glen makes questionable life choices
- Is pepper a fruit?
- No one wants a lawsuit
- Mark is a cheating bastard!

Minisode 3 - Kickstarter

In this Minisode, we discuss the use of Kickstarter as a platform for board game creation. We get Patrick's expert opinion, because we literally know nothing! Highlights include:
- We mess up the intro
- Format change!
- Too bad Canada doesn't have its own language
- The Kickstarter baby is an ugly twat
- What if you back something and then die?
- Fucking Chinese New Year!
- Wingardium Leviosa?

Episode 14 - House Of Danger

Strange phone calls in the middle of the night? Weird dreams pointing to a creepy ass house in the middle of nowhere? What could go wrong? Find out as we play House Of Danger... Highlights include:
- Can fictional people write books?
- Why isn't it just a book?
- Don't stop around to look at shit
- Mark would rather play without me
- I wasn't exactly rolling in lols
- Mark can't remember the motto

Episode 13 - Firefly Adventures

We aim to misbehave as we play Firefly Adventures! Highlights include:
- I mutilate some Danish (language, not people)
- Mark admits he doesn't know anything
- We get a pretentious Latin motto
- Where do we get the guns?
- I ditch the plug

Episode 12 - Monopoly Cheaters Edition

There's a distinct rise in criminal activity as we play Monopoly: Cheaters' Edition! Highlights include:
- Mark does not remember Kwanzaa
- I try some Swedish
- It's our first actual board game, with pieces and a board and everything!
- Mark plugs his own podcast again

Episode 11 - Cards Against Humanity

We Skype up some Yanks for a transatlantic game of Cards Against Humanity! Will there be horrific misunderstandings, or is offensive material THE universal language? Highlights include:
- It's our longest episode!
- Mark continues to deny his hatership
- I disobey the Spreadsheet
- Fog Of Love has indeed caused a divorce
- Would you play this with your mum?
- We all do awful accents
- Cassie is a stickler for the rules
- If I don't have the Jew Pack, does that make me a racist?
- Cassie and Chris don't know who our Prime Minister is...
- 9 times out of 10, Dick Fingers will always win
- We have a Haiku-Off
- I plug my own books. They're good...

Episode 10 - Fog Of Love

Can we survive a relationship simulator? Or will we realise that actually we hate each other? Find out as we play Fog Of Love! Highlights include:
- We briefly re-visit Doctor Who Fluxx
- Supernatural Trivial Pursuit finally makes sense
- I get box confusion
- What is the audience? Couples? Friends? Girls? Spies? Whoever it is, Mark offends them
- We meet Tolkien's new elf, Tutariel
- Otters = Lack of discipline
- I say 'you know' about 6 million times
- Could Fog Of Love ruin your life?
- Both of us were utterly miserable in our relationship
- Nothing shall be plugged
 

Episode 9 - Hostage Negotiator

Mark tackles the solo challenge of trying to negotiate the release of some hostages from a crazed loon. What could go wrong? Highlights include:
- 3D Snakes and Ladders disappointment
- We've caught up with the backlog in some weird meta self-referencing
- Drink every time someone says 'Hostage Negotiator'
- Mark takes charge
- More than half your hostages dead? That's not a win is it...
- Edward Quinn needs to calm the fuck down
- It's called 'Hostage Negotiator' not 'Hostage Ignorer'
- Mark remembers to use the past tense

Episode 8 - Elder Sign

We couldn't save Arkham with cards, but maybe we can do it with dice! Bunty joins us as we play Elder Sign! Highlights include:
- Mark makes another stellar character choice
- Bunty went to Piranha Land
- Mark's advice = look at the symbols and just try and win
- Tactics? From Bunty?
- Bunty doesn't have the brains
- Dice rolling is actually a lot harder than it looks...
- Mark is single-handedly responsible for everything bad
- I use an actual flashback from Episode 2
- I try to do an impression of Mark
- I don't know how to suspect things
- I can work a spreadsheet, but I can't work socks

Episode 7 - Legendary: Buffy The Vampire Slayer

We travel to Sunnydale for a game of Legendary: Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Grab your stakes and prepare to get dusting! Highlights include:
- Mark encounters reading issues
- I can't use dividers properly
- Board, Mat... same thing!
- Shit shuffling strikes again!
- Master wins: we are shit
- There's no shafting
- Mark blasphemes against the Spreadsheet
- Huge card boxes - they are the future

Minisode 2 - Expansions

This week, expand your knowledge as we talk expansions! Highlights include:
- Warren Rice is still missing, and a load of Miskatonic students are dead
- Mark has literally no thoughts
- I sow the seeds for an Expansionode? Expandode? Expanode?
- Mark tries to go against the spreadsheet

Episode 6 - Escape From The Aliens In Outer Space

Patrick and Meriel join us this week, but shit! I forgot to scan for human DNA - Will it be ok, or will we have to escape from aliens in outer space? Highlights include:
- I mess up. A lot
- Finally, someone who can appreciate the finer points of The Spreadsheet
- Meriel is the first girl we've had... on the podcast
- The Wedge Effect is lost
- Mark reads the rules
- Lying is hard. Tracking is hard. It's all hard
- Mark is the enigma
- "Bad guys"
- I'm the worst kind of bastard
- Well done to Italy

Minisode 1 - Pet Hates

After playing Arkham Horror The Card Game again (unsuccessfully), we discuss the major crimes of the board game world, and what generally ruins the experience - watch out, the spreadsheet takes a bashing! Highlights include:
- New scary interludes
- 'Alternisode' sounds a bit shit
- It's not Colditz
- I'm a bit of a hypocrite
- You SHOULD get up and have a drink
- The podcast is called 'Organised Fun' not 'Do What You Want Whenever You Like'
- Even stupid people can follow rules
- We introduce our new Scandinavian friend, Yarn

Episode 5 - Arkham Horror The Card Game

Join us as we battle to rescue Dr Francis Morgan from eldritch monstrosities! Key points include:
- The importance of The Wedge Effect
- Canada are a bunch of thieving bastards
- Mark always picks the shit characters
- I don't know gambling terms
- Mark doesn't like reading or listening

Episode 4 - Supernatural Trivial Pursuit

Holy water? Check! Silver bullets? Check! Extensive knowledge of source material? Not so much... Join us as we play Suppernatural Trivial Pursuit. Highlights include:
- Shock over Mark's Twitter followers
- I lose the rules
- Beer isn't a food

Episode 3 - Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Card Game

Prepare to kick ass and rock out as we play Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Card Game! Highlights include:
- Derek Ring is around!
- Mark can't say 'innovative'
- Why is my box a different colour?
- Mark likes a board
- Mark sighs a lot
- Mark develops a new catchphrase
 

Episode 2 - Fluxx Double Bill

Park the Tardis and get the beers in as we play Fluxx! Key points include:
- Mark doesn't remember basic podcast conventions
- An official Gamers Vs Haters mechanic is established
- Derek Ring!
- Hand limits suck
- Concentrating is hard
- I love Tegan
- The cat gets annoyed
 

Episode 1 - Bears Vs Babies

We play our first game, Bears Vs Babies. Key points include:
- My amazing spreadsheet
- Mark's best 'Broadcast Voice'
- Our impressions of Judge Judy
- My rule reading skills get criticised
- Mark describes his beaver
- I can't shuffle
- Mark doesn't know what 'plug' means